Sorry Part #2

“There comes the point where you have to have your priorities straight, Patrick. You can’t live in the past forever,” said James. “You have to move on and stop fighting what you’re fighting. Move on, be strong, and get on with it”. Patrick was contemplating quitting school, quitting everything. Patrick felt that he might have depression and severe anxiety. However, James felt otherwise. “I don’t think you have depression or anxiety; I think you’re in a funk or a stage of contemplation. Contemplation of what matters to you. What your future looks like”. 

    Patrick said, “is what I want to do accomplishable. Am I capable of getting ahead, finding love again, or being happy”? James responded, “what is your goal in life. Or your goals? You have yet to state them, plus to find love and to be happy. What makes you happy? What makes you love people. That’s what is important. Your values”. James was very aggressive in stating these opinions; Patrick was in a feeling loop. James said, “look, Patrick, we are on the beach, we are walking and talking, the sun is bright, it’s a beautiful day. Maybe, you should walk along the beach every day, feel the breeze, and try to find happiness within the overcast clouds.”

    As they were walking down the beachside, James and Patrick were approaching the Los Angeles Pier. The sky was orange and yellow, a light cool breeze, people playing volleyball on the beach. “Look around you, is this happiness to you? You see families; you see environmental beauty, you see mother nature, you see life around you. Plants, animals, humans. Find meaning in life, Patrick. There is plenty of it,” James said. “Life is short, sitting and thinking things that have already happened, that are in the past, and out of your control, will only stress you out even more. It would help if you moved on”. James turned in front of Patrick and looked into his eyes, “the sooner you have this mentality, the happier you feel.”

    James turned and walked with him side by side on the peer. They sat down at the edge of the peer, staring out at the orange and yellow sunset, watching the tides come in and out. “I have a question, James.” James responded, “what is that.” As they were swinging their legs, Patrick asked, “Are you mad at me for dating your cousin? What did I do wrong? Did I offend you? Am I a bad person”. James responded, “look, this is between you and her, I’m not involved. I think you’re a genuine person who cares, perhaps too much. But, the fact that you do care says enough. I think Annie needed some space; perhaps you were not aware of that,” said James. “Do you think she will get back together with me someday,” asked Patrick. “Who knows, but what you should do is give her space, time, and respect. Let her have time to reflect, perhaps a few months. Then slowly start establishing trust and respect, perhaps become friends again,” said James.

    Patrick asked James another question, “should I keep going to school.” James turned his head fast, “yes. Your future depends on it. Financially, economically, and socially. If you want to be happy, do what you like, maybe have a family, schooling will help. Cut and dry”. Patrick responded, “okay, fair enough.” James stood up, as did Patrick, turned around on the peer, and started walking back to the beach. 

    As they were walking down the peer, a girl their age was running towards them. Patrick and James were the only ones on the peer. Standing by the edge, James responded, “Annie! What are you doing here”? As she was running and crying, a smile was on her face, she jumped at Patrick, and both fell back into the ocean”. James turned around and yelled, “what the hell, are you guys alright”? 

Sorry Part #1

“Are you done feeling sorry for yourself yet,” asked James. “Listen, you need to get off the couch, quit moping, and do something with yourself. Sitting around crying, moping, and being sadistic to yourself is going to get you no-where.” James and Patrick had been friends for nearly ten years, their friendship was on the brink of collapse. Patrick was dating James’s cousin, but they had broken up almost two weeks before James confronted Patrick on it. James found out about the break up nearly a week after it happened. It wasn’t Patrick who broke up with James’ cousin, but James’ cousin, Annie, dumped him.

“Okay, let’s walk through this Patrick, step by step, and try to understand how we can get you out of this funk. Is that okay,” asked James. Patrick responded, “yes.” James started out by asking, “why did Annie leave you”? Patrick replied, “she said she couldn’t handle me micromanaging our relationship.” James responded, “how did that make you feel”? Patrick met, “oh, don’t try to play the therapist role on me, James,” cynically. “Patrick, either you sit on the couch for the next three months moping and crying about how you lose Annie, or you pick yourself up and move on. I’m only here to help you. Otherwise, have at it.”

Patrick said, “Annie suggested that I see a therapist for potential OCD diagnoses. She was considered that I was talking to her too much. Plus, it was too controlling.” James responded, “okay, that’s fine. But, what exactly was it that triggered her to break up with you. This couldn’t have happened out of the blue. Something had to have led to this. There has to be a pattern of behavior here”? Patrick responded, “one thing she did say was that she was tired of the constant interfering with her guy friends, mainly in trusting them with her.” “Ah, ha,” said James. “Were you doing this consistently.” Patrick responded, “I was often worried that she was cheating on me, it was like I was dependent on her, but she wasn’t making me dependent on her, I was.”

James asked Patrick a question, “so, essentially, you had trust issues with her. She didn’t like that, and she wanted to trust her, but you couldn’t. Therefore, you micromanaged her affairs”? Patrick sadly responded, “yes.” Patrick was bursting in tears, James while not emotionally inept, rubbed his hands-on Patrick back, saying, “you’ll be a fine man. You have to pick yourself up and move on.” “Treat her with respect and fairness, even though she dumped you. It probably was a good thing,” said James. Patrick responded, “why do you say that.” “It was apparent that fate was not on your side in this relationship, perhaps this was the first-time experience you needed. A real girlfriend, a real relationship, and experiencing real love,” said James. “You experienced heartbreak, everyone faces that in life, whether through friendship, love affairs, and rejection. Life is about choices, you have options, but those options have consequences. What you do now will reject the future. Make sure fate is on your side,” said James.

Marry Me

“Erin, do you care about me? Do you love me enough to be in this relationship”? Erin and Kassie had been in a relationship for nearly twelve years, since their junior year in high school. They went to the same university and believed they were life long lovers. Though, they were worried about others’ opinions of their relationship. Kassie asked Erin, “are you worried about what your parents think about our relationship”? Erin responded, “yes, I am. My parents have never been supportive of us; after all, it violates their beliefs”.

Erin and Kassie loved each other, were loyal and would do anything to help each other succeed. They wanted a family together, and they wanted to be with each other for eternity. Kassie, “who cares what your parents think? It’s not their life; it’s not their love, and even though they don’t support the decision, don’t they still love you”? Erin responded, “I honestly don’t know. I have not talked to them in nearly nine weeks because I believe in this relationship; they do not”.

Kassie was convinced this relationship would work, despite traditional marriage taboos and standards. Kassie is very progressive. Erin was gradual but easily influenced by her conservative parents. Erin always felt that they didn’t care about her unconventional values. She didn’t care about religion entirely and didn’t believe that the whole of life is not keen through just God, but through valuing people, not seeing them as objects, but as fellow human beings. Kassie asked Erin, “Is it your parent’s religion holding you back from this relationship? I’m just asking questions.” Erin responded, “my parents are strong Roman Catholics. They don’t believe in same-sex marital relationships. It’s influenced by their generation and their own bias beliefs. This is what I’m worried about when it comes to you and me”.

Kassie said, “Erin, I want to be with you for the rest of our lives together. I want to have a family, raise children and see grandchildren, and travel the world. We can do this! Who cares what anybody else thinks”? Erin responded, “You know what? You’re right. If my parents love me enough, they will support me, nurture me, and make me be the best person I can be. Even if that isn’t good enough, they’ll have to deal with it. It’s my life, not theirs”.

Kassie and Erin were both pursuing further schooling at the UC-Berkeley, in northern California. While their parents lived outside of California, both women went to Berkeley because of its progressiveness, beautiful weather, and the fact it was the right school.

Kassie responded to Erin, “It’s your life, Erin, either you want to be with me, or you care what your parents think, or you don’t want to be with me outside of your parent’s belief.”

Erin responded, “Will you marry me”?


           “In today’s world, was exactly does conflict mean,” ask Professor Lewis. “We need to think outside-the-box when we ask this. What does conflict mean”? Andrews, a sophomore at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, responded, “typically, conflict is between two groups, powers, or actors.” “Just two,” answered Professor Lewis. “Well, again, it’s situational,” responded Andrew. “Yes, you’re right. Now that we are getting to the gist of it, what are some examples of conflict”? Maddie responded, a junior at the University of Wisconsin-Madison also, “You and your parents fighting over a specific issue, maybe relationships with a lover or who you should be friends with”? “That’s an example, yes,” responded Lewis. “But there’s more to this. What types of conflict happen in the world”? Patrick, a freshman, replied, “war, politics, trade, judicial powers, and even in education.” Lewis responded, “exactly what I was looking for.” “Here’s what we are going to be talking about in this course. Problem solving. How do we solve the international conflict”? 

           Lewis went on, “how do we negotiate deals with foreign nations. Do we seek a win-win solution, or do we seek a win-lose situation”? Patrick again responded, “I think it depends. If it’s an adversary, probably seeking a win-win, but you could also say the same with an ally. Most political figures will not compromise principle”. Professor Lewis asked Patrick, “What does principle mean. What is the principle?” Patrick responded, “it’s like a value you have or rule that you refuse to violate.” Lewis responded, “basically, yes.” Professor Lewis went into lecture and talked about how trade policy can impact not just two or three nations fighting in a trade war, but the whole world. The stock market, impoverished countries, developing nations, everyone is affected. Internationally, typically you build coalitions and allies to make your case in a conflict. Or, perhaps, build coalitions to show an alliance of power against powers that seek destruction. 

           Patrick raised his hand; Lewis called on him, “Prof. Lewis, do you think religion helps or hinders progress in the world? To me, it seems to do more harm than good.” Professor Lewis responded, “well, that’s a great question. Does religion impact political decisions”? “Well, it could, we see this with Islamic fundamentalists in the Middle East, spreading destructive ideologies and carrying out violent acts to seek their vision, absolutely.” Professor Lewis went on to say, “I think also religion should not be mixed with the state in any way possible. I tend to believe that religion also does more harm than good.” Patrick, responded, why? Lewis responded, “well, an example is a religious fundamentalism. All Muslims are not bad people, but the faith gets painted as evil people. However, that’s not the case. I know many Muslims who are fabulous people.” “The point is, we all have interests, as nations, groups, and organizations. We seek to achieve those interests, at whatever costs. That can help or hinder our success”. 

           Professor Lewis asked Taylor, a freshman. “What she thought could solve a conflict.” Taylor responded, “What could end it or solve it is maybe some financial or economic trade deal, or releasing of prisoners or terrorists. Hostages released, geographic land was given, and a lot more”. “Exactly,” responded Lewis. “The point is we have many issues facing the world right now, a lot of conflicts, with a lot of ways to solve it. We have resources and interests; we have to put smart and pragmatic people in the office to deal with these problems”. 

The Power of Huawei

Should we fear 5G? Should we fear China? Should we fear Huawei? There are many questions to be asked about Huawei, ethical concerns, and also who has access to our information, globally. It is sporadic for governments to go after a private company or an emerging corporation. Why is Huawei such a threat to the United States and perhaps the world?

               Huawei is now the largest technology company in the world, founded in China in 1987. Today it is the largest seller of telecommunications equipment. Revenues have exceeded over one-hundred and three billion dollars, Huawei is a great company and could be a future powerhouse. When we think of Huawei, we think of handsets, phones, and gadgets. In 2015 the company sold two-hundred-million handsets. However, half of their profits and sales come from selling network equipment.

              One thing that worries governments around the world, more so the United States, is the part of the company aiding with the development of cities, infrastructure, and transportation. Huawei is one of the three largest technology companies selling networking equipment. According to the Economist, in 2014, Huawei outgrew all of its competing companies, reaching nearly three billion people.

              President Trump has said that he would like to see American technology companies start involving themselves with 5G and emerging telecommunications companies. Even 6G could be even more powerful. The most significant impact of 5G is associated with the internet and automation. An example of this is self-driving cars. We will need 5G to do such. In a sense, 5G could bring the world together even further than it already has. There are many possibilities, but with warnings.

              Many people are worried about “a hostile power,” that being China, being a leader in 5G networking. Perhaps, technology in general. China is known for its state-run media, controlling the internet through online patrolling agents, and suppressing the press. Is this at all relevant? President Trump has said numerous times, “5G companies and technologies must be secured and must be strong”. However, according to the same video documentary in the Economist, there is a problem with this powerful technology. The power of 5G and allowing a world-wide system to have access to our information, this could lead to countries spying on each other. It could is used as a weapon.

              Ren Zhen, the CEO and founder of Huawei, said, “I do not understand the political motivation surrounding the company.” Telecommunications for rural areas, specifically for farmers, ranchers, and communities outside of major cities, are now relying on Huawei products. A lot of Huawei’s products are below the average market price. However, there is speculation and denial among Americans. The Chinese government has Huawei heavily subsidized by the Chinese government. Meaning, it is more accessible to provide cheaper products of higher quality. The argument by leaders in politics and technology, specifically in the west, that when we buy a Huawei product, we are essentially providing our information to the Chinese security service agency, giving them full access.

              It is giving many governments worrying signs because not only does this affect individuals, but companies and government agencies, specifically within the United States and its allies. With looming regulations and restrictions against Huawei domestically against Huawei in the United States, it is affecting local and rural broadband technologies. It is hindering more than hurting. President Trump’s trade war with China is explicitly targeting not just financial and trade deals, but also the rise of Chinese technologies. Cyberspace, the internet, telecommunications, and perhaps nanotechnologies, China is making huge steps in being a global leader in technology. Many people are benefiting from Chinese technology products.

              The argument by eastern nations, some people in the west who are not biased against China, and media outlets, specifically the Economist, is that the regulations of Chinese technology in the United States and perhaps other western nations are targeting China’s rise as a global superpower. China is making tremendous progress globally in technology, innovation, and science and engineering. China is a force to be reckoned with. However, there is no doubt that Sino-US relations will be the most important bilateral ties in the coming decades. It will define international relations in the twenty-first century, whether bound by diplomacy or confrontation. My argument is that China is not imposing itself on the world. They are seeking friendship. Nor through force and strength, such as the United States. They do not want to make enemies, seeking peaceful solutions to global problems.

                    China is on the rise, which could be a good thing. Since the fall of the Soviet Union, American policing around the world has caused massive blow-back. The irony is, a rising hegemony, China is not seeking to be a global police force, but rather make relationships work. We see this in making deals with nations around the world, more so in developing Asia. Granted, China has values and principles; they will not compromise. We must respect that. However, there is denial among Americans and members of the government that the decline of the American Empire will never occur. Perhaps, it is time to allow a new nation to be a leader on the global stage. China is a nation that has its internal problems, but who are we to judge how they conduct their affairs. How is the United States any different? We have a prejudice against African Americans, Latinos, and purposely pass laws to hinder their success. We have biases. So does China against Muslims int their western regions. The point is, Americans do not realize how hypocritical we are towards the affairs of others when we are just as abusive with power, if not more than other nations are.

Windows Of Opportunities

We are ignoring a lot of potential in the world. The United States should focus on other places around the world, rather than China, Russia, Iran, and Syria, perhaps the European Union. There much potential for nations around the world to forge better relationships with each other. We see the rise of China as an economically viable regional power, soon to be a force to reckon. The point is, the media, politicians, and other officials and credible figures, need to focus on the bigger picture. The future. Technology, energy, education, and public and global health. 

If we can get business, corporate America, and the private sector, to forge relationships with nations outside of our traditional view, it could be of benefit. In 2017 Tesla CEO, Elon Musk had met with the President of Turkey to set up business negotiations associated with satellites. SpaceX, while not a profitable company, soon likely will be. This year with Airbus building, SpaceX launching, two satellites will be put into space for Turkey. We’ve seen Elon also meet with the President and Prime Ministers of India numerous times to talk about innovation in automobiles, electric cars, AI, and other emerging platforms. Technology is the future; this is both good and bad. There are arguments to make about ethics, but sometimes breaking the status quo is worthwhile. 

Change is not a bad thing, but people make it harmful. What I’m getting at is, the private sector in America is taking the rest of the world seriously. Nations that are at a disadvantage and emerging powers within regions, like India. The United States government likes to control situations, containment policy in China, monitoring the Middle East, and making the Europeans adhere to the world order of the United States. My argument is that the United States government should pivot to South East Asia, parts of Africa, and Latin America. Brazil has potential; South Africa has potential, China and India have much potential. The focus is in the wrong place, emphasizing the misguided policies. We need to focus on the future. The future is here; we must seek it, implement it, push for it, and frankly attack it. 

We must elect officials in the United States, who are not short-sighted. They must have a long-term point of view, think-outside-the-box, and be strategic. How do we elect these people? Go to town hall debates, challenge the politicians, especially if they meander around a question. Follow up with them and continue to follow up until they answer your questions. Finally, use your voice. Use your voice to challenge the status quo, and if the politicians in your district or state are adhering to the principles, they originally stood for, vote them out of office. Take to the streets in peaceful protest, lobby on behalf of your point of view. Again, use your voice, your vote, and your head when taking on the establishment.

My Letter in the San Francisco Chronicle Last Week

I finally achieved my short-term goal, within two months of planning. If you want something bad enough, you’ll fight for it. That’s my mentality. Within reason, you’ll fight for it.

Move On

Those who live in the past constantly and rely to much others emotions, reassurance, and are constantly stuck in this mode of others, are doomed to have a miserable life. I genuinely wish you the best because it’s not easy, but at some point pulling the plug has to happen. It’s unpopular, but most times the popular attitude, opinion, and feeling, is the incorrect one.

The Experts

Listen to the experts, especially in mental health and health care. They know what their talking about. They are health care professionals. That being in any role in the health care field. They’ve got experience with case loads, situations and families. You must listen to them, they know what their talking about. They have the credentials, the experience, and the practice to help you. Take them literally, not figuratively. If they suggest something, take their advice because they’ve dealt with your situation before. They are likely to be right about the advice they give you.